This world does not accommodate me

People don't understand the full crippling effects of mental illness until it's them and most people claim to have depression and anxiety, because they felt down once, but fail to note that not everyone is cured after a visit to the GP and some Fuloxotine.

I’ve made a huge mistake and I want to die

I can't do this anymore. I can't do what I was doing forever. So you see, I have nowhere to run and this point. I'm all out of road to run and hills to hop. I'm stuck, once again, at a crossroads but I'm pretty sure all roads lead to a big drop with nothing but concrete at the bottom.


Who owns you?

We all question ourselves. We all have doubts as much as we have hopes and dreams. Sometimes the question is as simple as 'what shall I wear?' Or it can be a little more complex, with questions like "am I ready to apply for that job?" Trauma and products of (ex anxiety) can make answering…

I am a tiny city of immigrants (a morning journal)

Parts of me feel unreal or like they are simmering out of my existence. It's like I am losing little fragments of who I am. I grasp at them through the hazy cloud but I grab nothing but empty space, leaving me to question whether I was ever there at all or if I am…

The return of the morning journals

So I'm back to writing the morning journals again. Good! I deserve to express myself and write down my feelings without fear of what the world thinks because one shitty doctor took advantage of my trust. It has helped me to heal myself and understand my confusing thoughts. Many revelations come from this process. I…

I’ve been away from myself (a morning journal)

I've not been writing in my journal or updating this blog since the altercation with the psych. It left me questioning myself and it left me in a pit of despair, scrambling to get out, bloody fingered and muscle worn. But I'm slowly beginning to see, sometimes 'professionals' judge us wrong. They insist they are…

When psych and neuro cross paths

It's been a while since I wrote. That psychiatrist has truly messed me up. He was cruel and pedantic and left me mind reeling with suicidal thoughts and deflated from hope. They often have this effect on me. I won't talk about the whole thing but I am appealing for a second opinion and making…